The TV Dump

First up Star Trek: Strange New Worlds. CBS is not giving up (*long tired sigh*) on Star Trek. They are launching yet another series. This one is a spin-off of Discovery, and in a rather bizarre ironic twist, this is going to be a show that I am 100 percent is only accidentally based on Gene Roddenberry’s first iteration of Star Trek. This is going to be a Star Trek show featuring Christopher Pike as the Captain of the Enterprise.

And seriously, it wouldn’t shock me in the least if no one involved with the production had had no clue that ” The Cage” pilot even existed.

This is a Star Trek production company that makes some intern watch the old episodes and write a few memos about what is probably good fan service. And the intern is stoned and reading Reddits on his phone. The actual writers don’t know anything at all about Star Trek and they cherish their ignorance like a lost child found wandering in the woods.

Then again, I could be wrong. Maybe it will feel like Star Trek. Lets look at the announcement.

“Strange New Worlds” will star Mount and Peck, along with “Discovery” guest star Rebecca Romijn as Number One. The premiere will be written by Akiva Goldsman…” fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuckity fucking fuck.

No, it’s going to be more garbage for SJW babies. Akiva Goldman is very much a part of Alex Kurtzman’s league of incompetent writers. She was a big part of the disaster that was and will remain Picard.

Something else for me to watch one episode of and avoid after that.

Next up. I may have been wrong about Batwoman.

I am starting to get a few second-hand reports about life on the set of Batwoman. The part is probably going to be recast. Yes, the numbers are bad, by normal standards, however by CW standards it’s a big hit. It’s the third-highest show they have, so yeah, we are going to get another Batwoman.

From what I’m hearing, Ruby Rose was allegedly a nightmare to work with on the show. She moaned and bitched about having to work three hour days. She was allergic to the costume, so if you see the costume, she’s not on camera. On the other hand, she was badly injured and also, (this was news to me) a production assistant was paralyzed on set. One serious injury is an accident but two reeks of incompetence. Somebody on the stunt side isn’t doing their job. This is a rinky-dink outfit, the quality of the show prooves that.

I am curious about what angle they are going to take. Are they just going to insert a new Kate Kane and just tell the audience to ignore her face? Or are they going to get rid of the character and start all over? And they would have to start all over most this show is about her relationships with former lovers and her family members.

One thing is for certain, I’m going to miss the OG version. It was so bad it was hilarious.

LAST

The Zack Snyder Cut of Justice League.

So, what is going on here?

Basically, it’s the Mandalorian syndrome. AT&T was pretty debt-heavy before the WuFlu blew into town. They just made another big debt offering. Now they are in better shape than Disney, given that they can make money off of shut-ins. So, basically, they aren’t hurting but they are very uncomfortable. Consequently, they want HBOMax to make as big a splash as possible. And while Disney Plus has had a pretty anemic performance, it did have a genuine hit with Mando.

AT&T wants its own Mandalorian. The problem is they don’t have a comparable situation. The long time Star Wars fanbase just wanted something that didn’t actively hate them. That was all. Just a show that said, we don’t despise you and everything you ever loved about Star Wars. And the Mandalorian delivered on that. Heck, maybe somebody there even likes Star Wars, it’s possible.

The problem for DC fans is different. They just want something that reminds them of the old Cartoon Network show. Because it was better than any of the DC movies so far.

And there is no way in hell that glum, stoic Zack Snyder can deliver on that.

Yes, Justice League was a very broken movie and a lot of that was due to last-minute course corrections dictated by Warner Brothers. Superman’s face is the result of the kind of errors that happen when the effects team is being rushed. They didn’t come up with new costumes and the ones that they had, looked bad in daylight. They were only meant to be seen in Zack Snyder’s favorite color palate of Dark and Raining. And Joss Whedon just plain sucks now. I used to like him but I got over that after looking at his twitter page.

The problem is that the concept is fundamentally flawed. The reason Avengers worked so well was that almost all of the characters had had their own movies or had at least been introduced in one already.

Justice League was the first time we were meeting half of these guys. And it is very hard to introduce a bunch of new characters and then get the audience to like ALL of them in the space of just two hours. The other problem is that Zack Snyder just doesn’t get Superman on any level. The man is a hard-core Objectivist, so, he is deeply confused at the baseline about a guy that would selflessly save the human race. He can’t get a handle on the guy. He’s great with Grim Dark. He can handle Cyborg and his clinical depression. He gets brooding, sullen Batman. But selfless heroes leave him wandering about in confusion. This is a guy who probably thinks Thanos was indeed the hero of Infinity War. While Whedon’s version was bad at least he understood what the audience wants from Superman:

No matter what Snyder’s fangirls think, yeah, it’s gonna suck.

Okay, I’m done here.