The Final Trailer for Star Wars

Disney swears it, so you it’s the truth.

And the truth is this looks like a J.J. Abrams film.

Loads of eye-candy. Zero content.

UPDATE: Critical Drinker’s hot take

I know I’m going to be walking out the theater asking myself, “was there anything I liked?”

5 thoughts on “The Final Trailer for Star Wars

  1. You can tell it is a Jar Jar movie because you have a spaceship rising out of something (clouds, water, ice, etc.) It’s his space movie go to move besides lens flares.

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  2. I love me some starship pr0n, but…no. Three straight hours of all-out Endor-Coruscant-and-Scarif-combined pr0n wouldn’t be enough to drag my ass to the theater.

    It’s a testament to how crappy the First Order is as a concept that JJ had to bring the real Empire out of retirement to elbow the not-Empire out of the picture and fight the not-Rebels, who should be on their last legs anyway since there are like eight of them left at the end of The Episode Which Shall Not Be Named.

    The concept of an Imperial remnant is one that’s been done repeatedly in the old EU, and there are a lot of different places you could go with it. But nope, JJ just had to write his fan fiction which enabled him to remake Star Wars instead. What a colossal waste.

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