Blogs and Ends

Interesting weekend. I spent it learning to plow a field by hand. And by hand I mean I was using animal power instead of a tractor.

The animals in question were a team of oxen and a team of horses. In case you are wondering which one does a better job. The answer is neither. It’s really more a matter of tradeoffs. Plowing with a team of oxen, is a two man job. One to steer the plow and another who has to drive the oxen.

A team of horses on the other hand only requires one man to do both jobs because the horses are smarter and more or less on autopilot. Or to be more accurate, one horse in the team is smart and he’s the one you put in charge of the buckethead.

Horses have more utility, you can use them for other things besides plowing but you have to let them rest more often. Whereas oxen can more or less chug along all day.

So why the freaking hell was Cataline doing this, you ask?

Well for the moment we’ll just call it “research.”

NEXT

More proof that Star Wars Galaxy’s Edge has augered in. Disney Parks has announced a special Christmas package.


  • Saturday, December 21, 2019:
     EXCLUSIVE nighttime access to ride Avatar Flight of Passage, Na’vi River Journey and Expedition Everest at Disney’s Animal Kingdom theme park. Plus, catch an EXCLUSIVE showing of the park’s new Rivers of Light: We Are One show.
  • Sunday, December 22, 2019: Tickets to Mickey’s Very Merry Christmas Party at Magic Kingdom park.
  • Monday, December 23, 2019 or Tuesday, December 24, 2019 (one night per reservation):Access to an EXCLUSIVE reserved viewing area to watch Epcot Forever, an all-new nighttime spectacular. Plus, each Guest (ages 3 and up) will receive a digital $50 Epcot Theme Park Dine Promo Card to use at participating Epcot locations.
  • Wednesday, December 25, 2019: An Ultimate Disney Christmas gift delivered to your hotel room.

The truth is that this package costs Disney Parks nothing BUT why offer it? Why offer it when all of this stuff always sells out anyway? Christmas is invariably the biggest day in the park every year. The Magic Kingdom has to close the gates because they are at capacity within an hour and a half of rope-drop. Yet this year, despite a roaring economy, they are on track to miss annual revenue goals. Consequently they are trying to maximize the fourth the quarter to keep the shareholders from demanding that Bob Iger be burned in a wicker cage to appease the gods.

And reason they doing so poorly is Star Wars Galaxy’s Edge. A dead attraction lowers park attendance overall.

NEXT

Something I ported over from the old site.

A nifty little three act play in 11 minutes. The boys are the director’s sons and he shot it on an iPhone.

NEXT

I saw Amazon’s new series, The Boys. Or rather I watched the first the episode and wrote off the entire show.

It’s bone-deep hatred of “Fly-Over Country” and “Jeebus” permeated every aspect of the show. The minds that created it, dwell in a grotesque SJW kabuki theater version of creativity. They are trying to be shocking and original and there is absolutely nothing that is unconventional or innovative here. New York City is the be all, end all of human existence and everyone wants to live there because if they don’t they are dwelling in the howling deserts and wastelands of Fly-Over Country

Basically the thrust of it is, what if the Justice League was evil? A question that DC comics has repeatedly answered and in a much more entertaining manner.

This one leaped off the screen and made me feel sticky and gross for days.

Cataline Does NOT Recommend.

NEXT

I finally got around to watching Ready Player One. I’ve been re-reading Snow Crash and my curiosity got the better of me.

I’m sorry I didn’t give it a chance earlier. I regret to say that I was taken in by the negative hype.

And most of the negative hype centered around Parzival “winning the girl like she was some kind of prize.” I should have given it the benefit of the doubt.

The Good. It felt like a nice old fashioned 1980s Spielberg popcorn burner. Apparently, when he’s not tied down by George Lucas he can still make a flick that is fun and exciting. There was no attempt to subvert my expectations, I appreciated that. The humor was measured, the CG design did what it was supposed to which was carry the movie. The story could have gotten completely lost in the effects but it didn’t.

The Meh. Can’t say there was not a lot of meh to be had. The anti-corporate message would have annoyed 1980’s Cataline but the modern version of me is pretty anti-corporate these days. I had heard complaints about popculture overload but honestly it didn’t bother me. In truth this movie will probably stand up to repeated viewings just to try and catch it all.

The Bad. Now this movie did hit one of my hot buttons. “Winning a girl’s heart with a declaration of true love.” Long time readers know that my view is that this is the worst lie Hollywood tells young men. A confession of true love for a girl you don’t really know is an extinction level event. She was just being friendly and now saying, “hello,” to you will be a chore.

Now that said, I will give it a light pass this one time. First because this romantic subplot irritated feminists. And second Art3mis did rub Parzival’s chest in a suggestive manner and then followed that up by swimming between his legs and squeezing his inner thigh. This is something beyond a casual Indicator of Interest. So blowing it by confessing his true feels is an acceptable faux pas on his part.

Cataline Recommends with Confidence.

LAST

Writing news.

I am drastically behind all of my twelve month goals because life hit me like a freight train this year.

However, I might be able to get close to one of them if I finish a book that is already pretty far along the way in development. At 35,000 words, A Song of Grod qualifies. Although I am still quite certain it’s not going to make any money. Sometimes just hitting a goal is needed whether that goal still has a rational purpose or not.

Okay, I’m done here.

4 thoughts on “Blogs and Ends

  1. You were stronger than me if you made it through the entire first episode. Once the one guy dropped his pants in front of the girl, I killed the show. Reviews on Amazon are brutally split. It’s 5 star or 1 star pretty much. One star is at 14% and 5 star at 75%. Based on the reviews, it sounds like the show gets worse.

    Ready Player One was decent.

    OT: I’ve decided the Duffer brothers are planning on shocking everyone with Robin isn’t a lesbian. She just said it because what Steve said panicked her. Even if wrong, just like homosexuals in the 80’s had everyone being homo, I’m declaring Robin heterosexual.

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  2. 1. I’m actually jealous you learned to plow like my grandfather did. No pun intended…I think.
    2. We’ll know for sure Galaxy’s Edge has cratered when they offer a $100 discount on cost of a lightsaber. I laughed my ass off at the shopping mall disguised as a theme park. And it couldn’t happen to a nicer bunch of Satanists. I know fully and completely understand the German term schadenfreude.
    3. Life hitting you like a freight train, I can identify. Still, thanks for the blog–like Denzel said in Training Day, it entertains me. Appresh.

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  3. Plowing with a team of oxen, is a two man job. One to steer the plow and another who has to drive the oxen.

    A team of horses on the other hand only requires one man to do both jobs because the horses are smarter and more or less on autopilot.

    it sounds to me like this is an argument for a mule team.

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  4. I read a bunch of negative reviews of Ready Player One (the book) which said it was terrible because it disregarded things like plot and character growth in favor of several hundred pages of the author shouting “LOOK HOW MUCH 80’S TRIVIA I KNOW!!!” I got the sense that it was essentially Cline acting out his fantasy of living in a world where his extreme nerdiness is both desirable and valuable, much like how Twilight is Stephanie Meyer acting out a middle-aged woman’s masturbatory fantasy. I skipped the film for that reason.

    I’ll have to check it out now.

    Like

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